Life after cancer

recent posts

about

  • The answer.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • If there is no karma, what is there?

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • Karma?

    Ever since my Near Death Experience I have thought much of Karma. We Americans tend to shorten the definition of Karma to “what goes around, comes around”. Hindus view it as a moral law, Buddhists as a natural law, Jainism as a physical law. Christians have replaced it with God’s law which states that you will get your just deserts in an afterlife. We everyday people tend to think of it as payment for our actions, good for good and bad for evil.

    I am not so sure. Let me tell you a tale. There was a couple that lived the Maryville area of Phoenix which in 1969 had no signs in Spanish. That year I lived further west, close to Perryville Road. That was long before the state prison was built there. The couple had a troubled marriage even though they were successful enough with a growing family. I think he was a realtor and she was employed by the Maricopa County Sheriff’s office – not as a deputy.

    On the other side of the valley (Phoenix and suburbs are in the Valley of the Sun) a couple of teenagers were found dead in a car on Dynamite Road, north and east of Scottsdale. That area, desert at the time, was known for teenagers parking and doing what teens do in parked cars in the boonies.

    After some months our realtor (I think he was a realtor, could have been anything) was arrested and then convicted of the murders. The strongest evidence was of a fingerprint found by the investigators that happened to be deputies in the Maricopa County Sheriff’s office. The fingerprint had been stored in the location where his wife worked.

    The realtor was sent to the state prison at Florence where he reinvented himself and became active in the JCs, especially the JC rodeo. Who knew that they had JCs and rodeos    in the Arizona State prison system.

    That could be the end of our story with no connection to Karma. But it’s not. Sometime after the millennium changed a migrant (undocumented) confessed that he murdered the two teens on Dynamite Road! There goes the ex-relator’s gig of running the JC Rodeo. He was released and was invited by his son who now lived in Colorado to stay with him.

    Ready for “happily ever after”? Not yet. The ex-con started to be inappropriate with the son’s children. Yes, sexually inappropriate. That ended the living arrangement.

    Shortly after the COVID pandemic, I had occasion to drive down the now paved Dynamite Road for several years, I remembered both the beginning and the end of this tale every time.

    Any Karma around? I don’t see any. The wife had never replied when asked if she knew anything about how her husband’s fingerprint appeared in place of tee migrant’s. Why the inappropriateness with the son’s children. Why no legal action because of it? Did the migrant have a good life for the (roughly) 30 years of freedom he had?

    And me? I just had my third PET scan with no sign of cancer. Maybe it’s just as Kris Kristofferson sang- “What have I ever done to deserve even one of the pleasures I have known?”

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • Navigating family memories after cancer

    My grandmother’s steamer trunk shipped from Billings Mt. to Akron Oh. via Railway Express after her death, 11 November 1957.

    I have been cleaning the garage out. It is hard work. Not the physical part; I have recovered enough for that. What to do with the “stuff”? That is the difficult part. Is it recyclable? No, yes, maybe? Is it hazardous?  Those questions are tougher. Then the hardest. Do I really want to get rid of this. I have had it 30, 40 years. Or since I moved to Arizona in 1966. As in the backpack I donated just the other day. And then there is the inherited family stuff.

    I never did well with my family of origin. It is too bad that I never realized that until later my life. The first clue I had was in the late 1970s. I was in the midst of a divorce which I did not want, working on a field assignment in California. I came to visit Phoenix and stayed with my parents. One day I mentioned something to my father in what I supposed was in confidence. Then I overheard him tell my mother what I had said. Later my mother repeated it to my brother.

    Ah, so that is how it is. I thought. I realized then that that was always how it was. Years later, I connected the dots and thought about how this came about.

    At my birth my father was in the Army Air Corps and stationed in South Carolina. Shortly after my birth my mother left me with her adoptive parents (in Salt Lake Utah, where I was born) and joined my father. They returned to Utah more than a year later with my brother (born 13 months after me in South Carolina). In us humans the first year is critical for bonding. I was never part of that family.

    They are all gone now and some odd 80 years later I have some stuff. Most notably a steamer trunk with mementos, pictures and letters from the long dead. Of particular note is one letter to my mother mailed in 1958. The letter mentions Harry and Nora, who I lived with for the first year of my life. But the letter isn’t signed and I can’t figure out who the hell wrote it.

    Before cancer I don’t think that would have bothered me so.

    The USPS was friendlier delivering mail in 1958. The address, 958 Canton Rd., was the trailer park (1958 terminology) and someone in the post office appended the street address of our trailer to the side where it was delivered.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • A cancer choice

    I went to the Celebration of Life for Merry last Saturday. The last time I saw Merry was in October just before she died. You may “pass” from other causes; I don’t know, but you die if the cancer is bad enough. One of these days I may find out if you pass from old age. I may if in the cancer lottery I miss the 30 to 50 percent chance of mine returning elsewhere in my body. If I pass, I’ll let you know. If I die I won’t.

    I was once described by a friend as a very private person. I believe Merry could have been described that way. She rode a Vespa which in the metro Phoenix area takes skill and courage. I gave up riding my motorcycle at 70. I am not sure I would have if my wife, Barb, had not suggested I look at it. At that, if I had lived in a less risky environment, I might have held on longer. But in Phoenix it was not too difficult of a decision. I think Merry lived life on her terms, and I admired her for that.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • On having a feeding tube

    Catch of The Day at Phoenix City Grill

    My Experience with a Gastronomy Feeding Tube

    For seven or eight months, I relied on a gastronomy feeding tube. While I cannot recall the exact date it was installed—nor have I been able to locate any records—I remember very clearly when it was removed. Before sharing more details about my specific experience, it is useful to describe feeding tubes in general, and mine in particular.

    Types of Feeding Tubes

    There are four main types of feeding tubes. My tube, known as a gastronomy tube (G-tube), connects directly to the stomach through an opening cut in the abdomen at the time of installation. Admittedly, the procedure is not pleasant. However, having a hole in the abdomen and stomach seems less troublesome than the alternative types that reach the stomach or small intestine by passing a tube through the nose or mouth and down the esophagus.

    Additionally, there is the jejunostomy tube (J-tube), which bypasses the stomach and connects directly to the small intestine through a surgically created opening. With all these tubes, nutrients are delivered in liquid form and inserted either with a syringe or a drip mechanism.

    Why I Needed a Feeding Tube

    My feeding tube was installed because cancer treatment dramatically affected my sense of taste. Chemotherapy impacts the taste buds via the salivary glands, while radiation affects both the taste buds directly and the nerves in the treatment area. Since my cancer was esophageal, I suspect radiation was responsible for most of the changes I experienced in taste. This is supported by the fact that, for me, everything tasted like cardboard or had no taste at all. Chemotherapy tends to make food taste metallic. Unfortunately, the effects of chemotherapy last for weeks, but radiation’s impact can persist for months—or may never be fully resolved. It has now been eight months since my treatment ended, and I am still struggling with some food.

    Feeding Methods: Drip vs. Syringe

    At first, my caregivers (in the hospital and rehab) preferred to use a drip mechanism for feeding. I am not sure why they wanted the drip vs a syringe, but using the drip always took longer than an hour, and sometimes even more. The extended feeding times were frustrating because I had to remain attached to a nutrient bag, which needed to be positioned above my stomach, resulting in limited mobility. While still in rehab, I switched to the syringe method, which was much quicker and more convenient.

    The end of the tube

    In December (2025) I had the tube replaced. I went home from the procedure and tested it (by using the Nestle Nutren (1.5 g protein per 250 ml). That was the last time it was used. That was difficult to do because I had to make up the calories and protein that the Nutren was supplying. I had already been supplementing the Nutren with some food (like ice cream, candy and protein drinks -that I detested). To my surprise, the calories were easier than the protein.

    Finally on January 9 (2026) I had the tube removed. A week later I celebrated at Phoenix City Grill with the catch of the Day which is pictured above. I still track calories and protein – AI is great for that task. Along the way I was surprised by my reactions to several foods. The first two foods I noticed that tasted as I remembered were frozen strawberries (as in Dairy Queen sundaes) and root beer (as in Shake Shack root beer floats). Fish is almost always good whereas beef and pork not so much. One last comment, beer is better than wine. For a snob like me, that is very surprising.

    Just removed!

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • It’s a mystery to me.

    In my front yard have a young saguaro cactus that has an insect impaled on one of the needles. Now, how the insect came to impaled I have not a clue. Still, there it is slowly being desiccated in the dry desert air. Did a sudden gust of wind blow it onto the needle? Did the insect simply misjudge the distance? Maybe the point of the needle is too small to register in its vision. It appears that the needle pierced the wing very close to the insect’s abdomen. Whatever happened is a mystery.

    The universe and our lives are filled with mysteries. Some mysteries we try to explain by invoking the odds of something transpiring. An example of that would be explaining my getting pneumonia after radiation treatment by explaining that I aspirated food into my lungs. Aspiration pneumonia is fairly common after treatment for esophageal cancer (20 % to 25 %, depending on the mechanism). Then there is “Silent Aspiration” which is just having food enter the lungs with no cough or immediate distress and is much more likely.

    OK, so for the first time, I can buy aspiration. But getting pneumonia a second time seven months after treatment? My first thoughts about the re-occurrence was that I picked it up because I wasn’t wearing a mask (shades of the COVID pandemic). Or maybe it was still lurking deep inside of my lungs. Or maybe I did aspirate food into my lungs again. Just like the impaled insect, it is a mystery to me.

    The good news is that I am getting better at understanding when there is something amiss. This time I went to the ER immediately and only spent two nights in the hospital. Now I wear a mask to work (where there are many homeless people) and other places where there are crowds. My oncologist referred me to a speech therapist (not for talking but for finding out if I am swallowing correctly). I’ll go. I am also getting a CT scan to see if there is anything lurking in my lungs. It may be a mystery, but I want the best odds I can get.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • There is nothing I can do about it now

    Going to work at Justa Center in the morning, I park under a tree across the street from the entrance of a parking facility for state (of Arizona) employees. The facility has roll down gates in addition to the traffic barriers which prevent unauthorized access. The roll down gates are closed at night and on weekends to prevent access by foot.

    Before last March and my enforced idleness due to my near-death experience, the gates rolled up at precisely 6:00 am. I marveled at the synchronization of time that this entailed. The gates, my cell phone and car radio all had the exact same time. After my return to work in October, I noticed that the gates were still closed after 6:00 am. I suspect that the time is now 6:30 am but haven’t validated this time yet.

    After noting the change, I came to the realization that the world outside of me had continued without me. The world had made changes during the six months that I had been concerned with my own affairs. I also realized that I had changed. My body had changed from the stresses of chemo, radiation and pneumonia; my thinking had also changed from my experiences.

    I view my life much differently than I did before the diagnosis. I am a human. As a human I have some good, some bad and much in between. Willie Nelson has a song, “There is nothing I can do about it now” that sums up my thoughts about my life. The closing stanza puts it eloquently:

    “I’m forgiving everything that forgiveness will allow
    And there’s nothing I can do about it now.”

    I have also come to question the meaning of human life in general. That is something that never occurred to me before. When I come to a conclusion about it I will let you know.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • Rehab lesson

    I had difficulties in my stays (two to be exact) in the hospital for pneumonia after treatment for cancer. Staying in a hospital is always unsettling with being woken up at unusual hours and with visits (always unscheduled) from doctors, dieticians, case managers, nurses delivering medications and the like.

    In my case I was being fed via a feeding tube, and this necessitated visits to be fed. I was also connected to IVs for hours at a stretch.

    All of that that was annoying enough, but the worst was having the bed alarmed because I was labeled “Fall Risk”. This meant that I had to press the “Nurse” button, wait for a response and then wait for someone to come to the room to turn the alarm off and help with whatever I need to do – usually go to the lavatory. I am not sure why I was a Fall Risk. Maybe just policy for patients my age (83). It was most irksome and the thing I disliked about the hospital the most.

    The hospital would not release me to my home, only to a rehab facility. That caused a delay as my insurance needed to approve my choice. But at long last I was transported to a rehab facility which eliminated Fall Risk and made existence more pleasant.

    Of course, I still needed the medications, IVs and feedings via the feeding tube on the schedule of those providing which meant that I had an unsettled schedule which was still annoying. And that is where I received the most important lesson of my recovery.

    One day I fell asleep before I got my third feeding (via the tube) of the day. Whoever it was that was responsible for the feeding did not wake me up. When I did wake up sometime after midnight, I pressed the “help” button. A nurse responded and I complained at length when he told me that he couldn’t give me the feeding.

    His response was that yes, I should have been woken up but that they (the facility) were not responsible for my recovery. The person that was responsible for my recovery was me.

    It took me a long time to get back to sleep.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates

  • Thanksgiving

    I have a lot to be thankful for today. I’ll start with just being alive.

    I was diagnosed with esophageal cancer in March (2025). Underwent chemo and radiation treatment in May. Developed pneumonia and then sepsis in June and was then hospitalized.

    While I was in the hospital some doctors were in favor of sending me to hospice. My oncologist said no and made it stick. Did I mention that she was voted (by her peers) Best Oncologist in Phoenix. No? She gets my vote also. She is the best!

    That was about the time she told me, “Well then you can just go to hospice and then die!”. I think I had been complaining about some aspects of recovery being so difficult.

    I call that my near-death experience. I survived and here it is Thanksgiving Day.

    The feast for the day (served in 3 servings) and new dinnerware.

    I never liked turkey any way.

    I am thankful.

    One morning this past week I parked under my favorite tree (in Phoenix shade is a desirable thing – no matter the bird droppings). After pulling to the curb, I had to wait to exit the car as a homeless person passed by with his bed and belongings. It was 6:15 and he was headed in the general direction of St. Vinnie’s dining room on the Keys Campus for breakfast. I often see people headed in that direction at that time. There are other services available on the campus but not this early, so I always assume they are going to get something to eat.

    This time of year, people with blankets are often seen but not usually a mattress. Later, after it gets warmer (than 60 at night) the blankets are left where used or on sidewalks and roadways. Shopping carts, such as this one, are common. Wheelchairs, baby buggies, and anything with wheels are used for transporting belongings. Alternately, Backpacks, handbags, shopping bags of all sizes and shapes are used. Sometimes an individual will have so much stuff that some is carried a block or more, sat down and then the previous load returned to. Single individuals are most common, but couples and other grouping may be seen.

    Some people are on bicycles. Sometime the bicycles are towing grocery carts or child or pet carriers. I have seen as many as three carts being towed. On 10th Avenue where I park, the most common direction of foot and bicycle traffic is almost always south and east. Farther west, the more are going to the north or west. Over that way, those that slept in the shelter are headed to convenience stores or bus stops. At least those are my assumptions.

    Unseen are the riders on DASH, the free bus route from downtown Phoenix. The Dash riders tend to be going away from the campus this time of day or maybe I just don’t notice them as much as the foot traffic. I also don’t notice the homeless living in vehicles as much this time of day. Usually, I arrive here just before or just after street parking becomes legal in this area at 6:00 am.

    This area and Phoenix itself was much different in 1974 when I first drove through this area. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix. Phoenix population was just over 600,000. The Central Arizona Shelter System now located on the Keys campus was not opened until 10 years later. The Phoenix Rescue Mission was located in an ex-hotel located just a little less a mile east of here at 4th Avenue and Washington. I-10 had not yet reached Phoenix, which was the reason I was driving through this area to my new job at Motorola in Scottsdale.

    But the homeless were in this area even then. I saw them mostly in the afternoon on my way back home to my home in the far west valley. The distance was 33 miles one way and drive time was more or less 60 minutes. I liked using Washington Steet (one way going west) and Jefferson Street (one way going east).  This meant I passed the Phoenix Carnegie Public Library building’s north side going home in the afternoon.

    The Phoenix Carnegie Public Library was built in 1905 and is situated on two blocks between 10 th and 12 th Avenues and Washington and Jefferson streets. It is a hansom brick building with its name above the doorway on the north side. The land it sits on is green with gras and shade provided by the many olive and palm trees. It is now owned by the state of Arizona. In 1974 it was owned by the City of Phoenix. Since it was no longer a library a panel of wood had been placed over the word Library. “Park” had been written in white paint on the panel with a paint brush none too neatly. I laughed as I drove by in my 1966 VW beetle with the windows rolled down. You don’t drive in Phoenix with the windows up in August unless you have AC.

    The homeless were enjoying the shade on the grass.

    I was conscious of homelessness because just two weeks before I first drove by the “Park”, I had quit my job in the West Valley without having a another to go to. At the time I had four children and a wife that was a stay at home mother. We lived paycheck to paycheck.

    Now I work at the Justa Center, across the street from the Carnegie Public Library. I see the homeless six days a week and I remember. But I don’t see them on the grass at the Carnegie Public Library grounds. The state of Arizona locked the gates